So, I am super aggravated right now and I figure since no one I want to talk to is answering my calls right now, I will just write it down on here. I can’t publicize this on any other site because I don’t want to offend anyone (which seems to be happening far too often these days and I don’t even know why I care). And since only 2 people actually follow me on this thing, I think I’m good to bitch about just anything.

Ok, so the reason I’m mad is this: I am really good at getting boys to like me for about 2 weeks. That’s usually about how long I can keep them interested. Things will be going great or so I believe and poof, things change and I am made into this person that doesn’t exist. It’s a cycle that is never ending. Well, I found a boy that I was decently interested and I thought things were going really well. We hung out a lot, we talked a lot and I even met his parents. So as you would imagine I’m thinking things are going great. Well, about 2 weeks into it and bam! I don’t exist anymore. Here I am, left in the dark without a clue as to what is going on. Always happens. Well anyways, we end up seeing each other a few weeks down the road and we have a great conversation about everything. He tells me that he had no intention of hurting my feelings or leading me in the wrong direction but things just moved a little too quickly for him. He told me that he had some things that he really had to take care of and figure out on his own before he could be committed to anyone at this point. And considering the circumstances of this person’s life, I completely understood and was completely content leaving this conversation. So, abount a month goes by and we see each other in passing and he still tells me all of this stuff and out of no where, I see that he’s in a relationship on FB! Now I know it’s crazy but we’re all creepers, just admit it. I’m just really frustrated with the situation because it’s not that you didn’t want to be in a relationship, you didn’t want to be in a relationship with me. And I hate being lied to. It’s just rude! It’s aggravating and annoying! But I just am frustrated that I can’t seem to do anything right in the area of dating. With this guy, I told him up front that I was into him and I wasn’t in to any game playing and I would be 100% honest all the time, I thought I deserved the same respect. So here, I am nice and I show my true self to someone and it’s not enough. I’m too nice. But in other cases, where I hold back and go into it carefully, I don’t show enough. It’s a lose-lose situation here for me. I can’t win. I don’t get what I’m doing wrong here. It’s a never ending horrible cycle that I can’t get myself out of. If you’re nice to people, your kindness is seen as a weakness. If you hold back and aren’t so nice, you’re a bitch. How do I find a happy medium? I just want to be myself and find someone that is okay with that. Maybe I’m asking too much of people but I really don’t think I am. This town is full of self-proclaimed gods and really they’re all a bunch of assholes.

I really have no idea what to do, but I’m done trying.

And that is it for my rant of the day.